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Eat oatmeal on the train when you "travel like a local"

A cheery publication aimed at visitors to our fair city encouraging them to “travel like a local” on public transit is a massive softball waiting to be belted over the fence and deep, deep into the bleachers. 

Jokes about remembering to avoid scattering detritus when rolling a joint on the bus or being sure to speak loudly enough for everyone to hear when engaging in a cell phone discussion about sexual activity and/or its resultant skin conditions are gimmes.  But the

American Public Transportation Association

is free of guile in its San Francisco list (

which you can read here

). But that doesn't mean we have to be.